My old work Part Ten-Skul-Man Script

This is for a reading project we had to do. I filmed it with two other nutballs, and it was a awesome success!

This is for the Faceless Ones, so ya know.

                    - room in house -

Valkyrie: (leans over body) He was taken by surprise.

Skulduggery: (walks into room and takes something from his pocket and sprinkles it in the air) (Mutters) not one trace...

Bliss: (walked into room) Detective crux is nearby. If you are caught at the crime scene...

skulduggery: we're going. (takes out scarf and wraps around lower part of head) we appreciate you calling us in on this, by the way.

Bliss: detective Crux is unsuited to an investigation of this nature. Which is why the sanctuary needs you and miss cain to return to our employ.

(THEY ARE TO LONGER TRUSTED BY THE OFFICIALS...)

- hallway -

skulduggery: four victims, all teleporters. Why?

(EVEN WHEN THE SITUATION IS CRITICAL...)

- street -

crux: oh. Its you.

Skulduggery: (stare at bodyguard on either side of crux) I see you're going incognito today.

Crux: (glaring at skulduggery)I am the sanctuary's lead detective, Mr pleasant. I have enemies, and as such, I need bodyguards.

Valkyrie: do you really need them to stand in the middle of the street? They look a little conspicuous.

Crux: (sneering) thats an awfully big word for a thirteen-year-old.

Valkyrie: (clench fist) actually, its not. Its fairly standard. Also, I'm fourteen. Also, your beard is stupid.

Skulduggery: isn't this fun? (smiles) the three of us getting along so well!

Crux: (walks away)

valkyrie: I don't like him.

(THERE ARE ONLY FEW THEY CAN TRUST.)

- lake -

skulduggery: I am Skulduggery Pleasant. My colleague and I seek answers.

sea hag: nothing you do matters. In the end, all things drown and drift away.

(TELLEPORTERS ARE BEING MURDURED...)

-lake-

sea hag: would you like to drown?

valkyrie:no, no thank you.

sea hag: (scowls)

(BUT NO ONE CAN FIND THE CULPRIT...)

- hotel -

sanguine: (almost walks into skulduggery and valkyrie) oh god.

skulduggery: (swings a punch at sanguine)

valkyrie: (runs towards fletcher renn) your Fletcher Renn. You're in great danger.

fletcher: (looks at valkyrie) what?!

Valkyrie: my name is Valkyrie Cain.

Fletcher: Valerie?

Valkyrie: (corrects fletcher) Valkyrie.

(ONLY A TELEPORTER CAN BRING THE FACELESS ONES BACK INTO OUR WORLD...AND THAT WOULD LEAD TO THE END)

- lake -

corpse: but the anchor is useless without someone to force the gate open, and only a teleporter can do this.

(SKULDUGGERY PLEASANT HAS MADE EVERYTHING RIGHT BEFORE...)

- lake -

sea hag: (snarls) it seems you do want to drown! (grabs valkyrie)

(A PEACEFULL ENDING...)

-sancutary-

guild: what a very polite way of accusing me of being a traitor.

(ITS GOING TO BE ALL RIGHT IN THE END THIS TIME, RIGHT?)

- sanctuary storage -

billy-ray sanguine: (hits valkyrie)

valkyrie: (falls on floor)

(WRONG)

- caves -

skulduggery: do you want to go first?

valkyrie: why would I what to do that?

Skulduggery: I just thought you might want to prove something to me.

valkyrie: like what?

skulduggery: I don't know, maybe that you're as brave as I am, or capable, or maybe something to do with not needing a man to protect you.

valkyrie: (shrugs) I'm okay with all that.

Skulduggery: really?

Valkyrie: really. Poke your head around, see if there is a monster waiting for us.

Skulduggery: (mutters something) (looks around corner) well. This is unexpected.

(422 PAGES LONG...)

- kitchen -

finbar: oh god, they know where we are. (frantic) they know where we are! (normal)They've found us and are waiting to be let in. (frantic) they're at the gate and they're waiting to be let in!

(A WORK OF ART...)

-farm-

valkyrie:Mr. Hanratty- (gets interrupted by paddy/batu)

paddy/batu: call me paddy.

valkyrie:are you sure?

paddy/batu:probably not.

(DEREK LANDY MADE A STORY...)

- farm -

fletcher: I can go through.

Skulduggery: you can't, and I wouldn't advise you try-

fletcher: (disappears)

valkyrie:(surprised) could he have gone through?!

skulduggery: (puzzled) I don't know...

valkyrie: (worried) if he's in there with the faceless ones, they'll tear him apart!

Skulduggery: no...its impossible.

valkyrie: so where is he?

(her phone rings)

valkyrie: (picks up phone)

-phone line-

tanith: hey val, did you happen to lose something? Not too bright, vacant expression on his face, silly hair? Ring any bells?

-farm-

valkyrie: he's at the van.

skulduggery: I'm going, (walk away) to kill him.

(THAT COMES TO LIFE)

-farm-

skulduggery: back to Ghastly place, I suppose.

fletcher: okay. (takes hold of Valkyrie's arm) we'll meet you there. (teleports with Valkyrie)

-roof-

fletcher and valkyrie: (re-appear on roof)

fletcher: (softly)you okay?

valkyrie: (punches fletcher)

fletcher: (yells) what was that for?!

valkyrie: shock mostly.

- house -

solomon: has he corrupted you yet?

valkyrie: (confuzzled) I'm sorry?

solomon: Skulduggery Pleasant corrupts everyone he meets. Have you noticed that?

-bridge-

sanguine: sword lady! (smiles) I have missed you, y'know what? Many a night I have lain awake, thinkin' of all the different ways I could kill you.

- china's house -

china: (wide eyes, gasping) My books! Some of those books were one of a kind!

Skulduggery: (laughs nervously) I understand that.

china: (ranting) priceless, skulduggery, priceless. Beyond priceless...

skulduggery: (nervously) i'll be happy to pay for any damage caused.

china:(yells) you cannot pay for priceless books! Thats why they call them priceless!

- farm -

batu: (pushes scepter forward and magically pushes valkyrie back)

valkyrie: (falls against wall) you...you batu! (gasping)

batu: I am.

valkyrie: you killed the teleporters.

batu: I did.

- farm yard -

valkyrie: (screaming) skulduggery!

- graveyard -

valkyrie: you have something to gain.

solomon: you are an astute young lady. I am hoping for something.

valkyrie: what?

solomon: you. (waves cain around) i'll be in touch. (disappears)

(THE FACELESS ONES)

(IN THEATERS 2011)

(DO WORRY. THEY'RE COMING.)