Thursday, April 7, 2011

Picture This- Prolouge


Prologue.


I suggest you read the summary first. It's the post before this...

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Mack sat on a large rock by the water, letting the sea breeze blow her dark, nearly black, brown hair.

“Maq Skies!”

Mack turned around to see a girl about her age, five, jump down the rocks to where she was sitting. The girl was dressed in a short, light pink dress, with black shoes and ruffle socks. Her shoulder length strawberry blond hair was pulled back with a pink bow clip.

“Maq Skies!” The girl exclaimed as she sat next to Mack “It's such a windy day!”

Mack smiled, nodding. “It really is Clever!”

Clever smiled back, looking at the crashing waves.

“Maq! Clever!”

The two young girls turned around to see a older girl with a red raincoat running down to meet them.

The girl sat on the other side of Mack, tightening a button on her raincoat. “It's going to start raining soon. It's best we move inside.” She said with a light English accent.

The girl looked at Mack and Clever, complete opposites. Mack was dressed in a dark blue shirt, with little khaki pants. Mack had on her light blue tennis shoes. Clever, if she would be real, and not a figment of Mack's imagination, would be the type to shop for cute clothes. Mack would be the one to curl up and read a good book.

“Virginia Sue! But I want to stay outside!” Clever whined.

“Clever, It's not always necessary to call people by their last name too.” Virginia sighed. “And you need to go in. There's not even a single ship on the horizon. Nothing can be spotted from the lighthouse except for you two on the rocks.”

“But-”

“No.”

“But-”

“No.”

I mean-”

“Inside.”

“Just wait-”

“Now.”

Clever huffed. “Okay. But The minute it stops, I'm coming back out!”

Virginia looked to smile at Mack. “You should to inside too Maq. You're parents may get worried.”

Mack nodded reluctantly. “Fine. I'll go too.”

The trio stood up, Clever holding onto the tail of Virginia's raincoat. Mack led the way, rubbing her cold fingers together. When the trio reached the top, they waved goodbye to each other, and headed in their separate directions. Clever Sue and Virginia Sue walked to the large lighthouse that sat on the edge of the cliff, and Mack Skies walked to the medium size house on the verge of trees, where she lived with her mom, dad, and older sister.

Older, dying sister. 

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Suggestions? How did you like it? Questions? Ideas on where the plot is going to go? Anything? Anything at all?

I'd really like to know...



12 comments:

  1. AWESOME!
    The OC's are original and cool in a mysterious-ish way :D
    CONTINUE! PLEASE! :D

    ReplyDelete
  2. Pandora- Cool and mysterious in what way exactly?

    Skyril- any other comments?

    ReplyDelete
  3. COOL!



    this iz really good!


    ...can't wait 4 the internet peeps 2 come in....




    >:)

    ReplyDelete
  4. EPICA! :D Really awesome, Mar.

    I never had an imaginary friend when i was little... :( now i wish i had one...

    ReplyDelete
  5. Nyx- when the internet bloggers come on, its going to get REALLY crazy, REALLY fast~

    Hellboy- i remember having a immaginary friend named Anakin. If its was Anakin Skywalker, i dont know. But i DO remember him.

    Anakin: i was the best thing that ever happened to you!

    Me: er...suuuure!

    Anakin: i kept you in line!

    Me: you got me in trouble!

    Anakin: still riled up about that, are we?

    Me: SHUTUP!

    Anakin: he he he...!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Love it Mar. It's suspenseful and and extremely well written. I had an imaginary friend when I was little. It was a griffin named Feather. It was so weird...

    Feather: I am not an 'it'!

    Me: Shut up. Yes you are.

    ReplyDelete
  7. *sighs*

    immaginary friends are annoying, are they not?

    Anakin: i'm right here!

    Me: quiet. your always with me, for you are a figment of my immagination.

    Anakin: nope! im real!

    *waves hand through anakins stomack*

    Me: ah, no you're not.

    Anakin: yes i am.

    Me: liar.

    Anakin: no!

    Me: you're lying about being a lier. so typical!

    Anakin: you're mean!

    Me: i DESERVE to be mean to you! after the quiz/test today!

    Anakin: you probably failed it.

    Me: IM HAVING A CONVERSATION WITH MYSELF! LALALALA! IM NOT LISTENING TO MYSELF!

    Anakin: *snort*

    Me: ...i just realized how odd that sounded.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Feather: We are not annoying! And we're reeeeaaaallll!!!!!!!

    Me: Shut up. You're a talking griffin that I spoke to when I was five. You don't exist.

    Feather: Yes I do!

    Me: Shut up.

    Feather: You're mean.

    Me: Liar.

    Feather: I'm not a liar.

    Me: Did Mar and Anakin not just have this conversation?

    Feather: *goes in corner and grmubles*

    ReplyDelete
  9. Love the imaginary friends!

    Well written and full of suspense.

    ReplyDelete