Thursday, February 25, 2016

(20) mountains

Run, run run!

Fuck, this was bad. This was like, all kinds of bad. This was like the lovechild of Until Dawn and Alien fucking Isolation1. If Rui had thought, when she woke up this morning, that she would have to deal with this shit, she would have just gone back to bed.

Who knew this island was full of hairless spider monkey-like monsters. Monsters who just love the taste of scared (scarred) teenage flesh. She tried to fight them, but there were way too many. She’d ended up hiding in a cave for an hour, only to nearly be assaulted by Aragog2 on steroids.

There was a gap, though. Higher up, on one of the mountains (volcano?). She’d ran without thinking, alerting all of the monkey monsters to her position before she really should have.

Motherfucker, She should have known that sneaking was the only way. She should’ve gone all Ripley Jr 3 on that shit.

The only problem was that it was pretty dang hard to sneak in an alien jungle.

Which, by the way, was not green-- it was mostly blue. Blue plants, blue dirt, blue monkeys.

Blue hairless monkeys that were trying to take her flesh and wear it like that one guy in The Office4.

Whatever, just focus on running up the space mountain.

Wait, space mountain was actually a pretty good ride wasn’t it5?

Whatever! Go!

A monkey flew at her face, screeching, and Rui screeched in response, smacking it with the shaft of her spear. The monkey was propelled away from her, but Rui kept running without ever stopping in the first place.

Hot damn, this was annoying.

How the fuck did video game protagonists usually deal with hairless monsters? Guns, maybe, but those didn’t work a concerning amount of the time. Fire, then, would be the best.

What would happen if she just like… set this entire forest on fire. What would happen.

Hm. Something to think about later.

When she finally (finally!) got to the opening, Rui leapt and willed herself away.

Thousands of light years later and a few dimensions over, she popped out again, landing-- wait she wasn’t landing she was falling down and fuck--

With a jolt, Rui was submerged in water.

1.  Until Dawn and Alien Isolation are two pretty cool horror games that have kinda spindly flesh-eating monsters.

2. Giant magic territorial spider. tchhhhchchc, come here my spider minions

3. Ripley Jr. (kinda not really) is from Alien Isolation. She’s like, 500% times smarter than the protags of Until Dawn. Those guys are basically just college kids who make SUPER bad decisions depending on what choices you make in the game.

5. what is that in like disneyland or smthn. i actually have no idea. whatever, it’s an amusement park ride. I won’t look that up, but i’ll totally look up the scene from the office because it’s fucking great

this is gonna be continued in like. the next part. tomorrow, defs.


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